By Dan and Dawn williams

The Polyamory Toolkit


The book focuses on specific tools people can use to address the common issues and deeper aspects of a polyamorous relationship. This work includes topics such as: Jealousy, Compersion – finding joy in your partners’ joy, Communication, Mitigating Triggers, Creating a Solid Foundation, and so much more.

Chapters Include:

  • And NOT Or  –  Learn to see others as adding to your life instead of replacing something 

  • Uncomfortable vs Wrong – Learn to distinguish between these two perspectives

  • Breaking Habitual Patterns –  You don’t have to respond based on your past

  • Place of Assistance – How to help your partners while staying true to yourself 

This is an easy to read and very useful book. More than 25 useful tools in bite-size pieces for anyone involved in Polyamory, considering Polyamory, or for that matter, many of the tools are useful for all relationships. I have found this book to be more helpful than any of the other books I have read on Poly.

I’m laying here in bed at 10:30 on a school night, tears leaking out of my eyes. All of you who know me know this part– I’m the mono slave of a poly guy. And I struggle. I almost didn’t buy this book because I thought “what can a book that was written by poly people, for poly people hold for me?”. I’ve been doing this for eight years now, I know what’s coming and that we will handle it together.

And by page 26, I know that I’ve been given a gift. A chance to further develop my skills to manage my part of this mono/poly dynamic. From a source I wasn’t expecting.

It’s fantastic! I got it, started reading and didn’t stop until I finished it! Huge CONGRATULATIONS!



(excerpt from The Polyamory Toolkit) Sometimes when I’m feeling emotional, I’ll turn to my ancient teddy bear for comfort. I mean, this poor bear is ancient. There are photographs of me just at the age of walking and holding onto this teddy bear at a Christmas tree....

Managing Surprises

(excerpt from The Polyamory Toolkit) I once started a relationship and, not wanting my current partner to be worried about it, I told her we are just dating but it wouldn't go anywhere. Fast forward twelve years and we all own a house together…. One of the polyamory...

Breaking Up When Poly

(excerpt from The Polyamory Toolkit) Being broken up with sucks for monogamous people. I’m sorry to say it sucks for polyamory people as well. Now, there can be some benefits to poly in this regard – a partner might break up with me, but I may have other partners to...

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Dan & Dawn

Dan and dawn are a lifestyle couple since 2001 and have presented at over 100 events around North America. They are the authors, podcast host, co-directors of an alternative community center, Presenter of the Year Award winner and mentioned in a number of books, articles, and other media.

“They move between clear and simple presentation of facts and information to personal stories of their fascinating experiences together, energizing their audiences with the ease and grace of people that enjoy what they are doing”

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