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By Dan and Dawn williams

The Polyamory Toolkit


The book focuses on specific tools people can use to address the common issues and deeper aspects of a polyamorous relationship. This work includes topics such as: Jealousy, Compersion – finding joy in your partners’ joy, Communication, Mitigating Triggers, Creating a Solid Foundation, and so much more.

Chapters Include:

  • And NOT Or  –  Learn to see others as adding to your life instead of replacing something 

  • Uncomfortable vs Wrong – Learn to distinguish between these two perspectives

  • Breaking Habitual Patterns –  You don’t have to respond based on your past

  • Place of Assistance – How to help your partners while staying true to yourself 

This is an easy to read and very useful book. More than 25 useful tools in bite-size pieces for anyone involved in Polyamory, considering Polyamory, or for that matter, many of the tools are useful for all relationships. I have found this book to be more helpful than any of the other books I have read on Poly.

The book was super useful. I recommend it to everyone who asks me for poly advice

Just arrived last week! I intend to use it with clients also.

I’m laying here in bed at 10:30 on a school night, tears leaking out of my eyes. All of you who know me know this part– I’m the mono slave of a poly guy. And I struggle. I almost didn’t buy this book because I thought “what can a book that was written by poly people, for poly people hold for me?”. I’ve been doing this for eight years now, I know what’s coming and that we will handle it together.

And by page 26, I know that I’ve been given a gift. A chance to further develop my skills to manage my part of this mono/poly dynamic. From a source I wasn’t expecting.

It’s fantastic! I got it, started reading and didn’t stop until I finished it! Huge CONGRATULATIONS!


I loved it … our family bought 3 copies to read together. We went through the entire thing, book club style

Comparing Sex

Comparing Sex

(exert from Polyamory Toolkit) Dan says… I happen to have sex with people who have sex with other people. Specifically, the two people I currently sleep with most often (1) also sleep with other people. My other partners have sex with a variety of other people, male...

Breaking Habitual Patterns

Breaking Habitual Patterns

(excerpt from The Polyamory Toolkit) We mention a few times in this book that there are times when we have had a partner tell us something and we did not respond as our best self. One of the big ones for me was when I found out one partner had slept with someone new...

Don’t take things personally

Don’t take things personally

(excerpt from The Polyamory Toolkit) Of course I take things personally. Everything is about me, right? Well, not so much it turns out. Other people’s actions certainly ‘feel’ like i should be taking it personally. My emotions tell me it’s personal. But, it’s really...

Best Selling Author

Dan & Dawn

Dan and dawn are a lifestyle couple since 2001 and have presented at over 100 events around North America. They are the authors, podcast host, co-directors of an alternative community center, Presenter of the Year Award winner and mentioned in a number of books, articles, and other media.

“They move between clear and simple presentation of facts and information to personal stories of their fascinating experiences together, energizing their audiences with the ease and grace of people that enjoy what they are doing”

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